Monday, October 21, 2013
Crushes are a beautiful thing. Not full love attractions, nor down and dirty lust obsessions, crushes are as every day essential to a healthy lifestyle as yoga or eating oatmeal. As children, a crush can be the first sniff--a whiff, if you will--of what love might be when we grow up. As adults, however, crushes are often casual and entertaining; something frivolous to pass the time and keep our libidos running. You may even share them with your significant other, or with complete strangers as I did here in this blog entry a few months back. Sometimes, even, a crush might become a true love connection. That cute girl who works down at the bookstore whom you've been crushing on for months now, might just someday end up being the mother of your children if only you would work up the courage to ask her out for coffee sometime. Or, in tragic cases, a crush might turn into an unhealthy connection and land the crusher flat on the "Go To Jail" space in this monopoly game of life we're playing.
But for the most part, yes ... that which we crush on is not meant to be taken seriously. We have them, we cherish them, we learn from them, and we move on. Now, while I've certainly gone on and on here on The Bimillennial Man about who my crushes have been of late, I thought I'd take a step back and re-examine all the ones I've had leading up to today. Scratch that. Such an endeavor would take far too long to write up. On second thought, how about I just narrow it down to celeb crushes? Women most of you are probably already familiar with. Hmmm, still too broad a selection? Okay, okay -- I got it! How about we narrow the criteria down to only actresses--television actresses at that--who I've crushed on up until the very cusp of puberty? In other words, those little boy crushes that we all find so adorable and endearing? Nothing wrong with that, right? I mean, awwwww!
So, okay then. Here we go. The following are a list of my top 10 tv actresses from a favorite sitcom or show of mine ranging from the late 70s, which is when I was born, until the cutoff point of 1990, which is the year I started high school and crushes took on a whole 'nother level of urgency and angst.
I'll start with the least impactful down to the most crush-worthy actresses of all time. Let's be clear, though: all of these actresses and, more importantly, the roles they played on television had some hand in shaping me into the man I am today. Or, rather, they influenced the kind of qualities I find attractive in a woman now at the ripe old age of 37. Sounds like fun, no?
And here we go ...
The Top 10 TV Crushes of My Youth.
10. Patricia McPherson -- Knight Rider (1982 - '86).
9. Robin Givens -- Head of the Class (1986 - '90).
8. Alyssa Milano -- Who's the Boss? (1984 - '92).
7. Valerie Bertinelli -- One Day At a Time (1975 - '84).
even now Valerie is kinda foxy for a 50-something year old. Rawrrrr!
6. Christina Applegate -- Married with Children ('87 - '97).
5. Tracey Gold -- Growing Pains (1985 - '92).
that one episode well into the show's run when she came out in a pink two-piece during a scripted family holiday. I learned the full meaning of adolescent frustration that airing. Hnnnnng!
4. Lisa Bonet -- The Cosby Show (1984 - '92).
3. Tiffani Thiessen -- Saved by the Bell (1989 - 93).
2002's Fastlane? Oh yeah, I even sat through that dreck solely for her! I'm shameless, I know.
2. Erin Gray -- Buck Rogers in the 25th Century ('79 - '81)
certain scene in particular that had all us boys leaning closer toward our television sets. Although I was very young, I do remember being completely smitten by Erin Gray's hotness by this point. Which was, to be honest, quite incomparable at the time. In fact, only one other actress on tv during this phase of my childhood gave me even more tummy butterflies than Ms. Gray--and she's currently the No. 1 entry below.
1. Lynda Carter -- Wonder Woman (1975 - '79).
still quite stunning. I attribute this miracle to her Latin roots, naturally. Those genes just don't quit, I tell ya! Can I get a hell yeah? HELL YEAH!!!
So, what do you think? I bet some of you are itching to tell me how incredibly wrong I am. I know for a fact one of my friends is going to burst a blood vessel when she sees where I've placed a certain cute Italian girl from Brooklyn on this list. Sorry, babe. We'll just have to agree to disagree, m'kay?
To the rest of you: I love dissenting views. Or, perhaps you actually agree with my picks? Whichever the case may be, please sound off in the comments section below as per usual. I'm anxious to hear your thoughts. And, hey, why don't you provide your own crush(es) from the same era? Boy or girl, keep them limited to television shows from the 70s and 80s for now. Heck, I'll even accept the 60s for some of my more well-watched readers out there.
But please, no shows from the 90s or recent. Thanks.