Monday, August 26, 2013

Sometimes ... What's The Point?

No, I'm not depressed or at a low point in my life. I'm not going emo on you all--ha!

But, seriously, I was wondering ... just what IS the point to a few things in life. What is the point when these things almost always end up in disaster?

First: What is the point of owning a pet? You get so attached to something that is only going to live a few years and then die on you. Who the hell wants to deal with that? I've been there before, and it majorly sucks. After my beloved Tiger cat of 19 years died a while ago, I refuse to ever get another pet. And if you get a dog, forget about it! You're lucky if you get more than 9 years with them. *shudder* This is especially bad if you get a pet for your children. You're basically setting your family up for heartbreak and a major crying fest in just a few years--right around the time they're almost through grade school.

Hope you had your fun with Sparky, kids!

Next: Owning a car. I happen to live in a city that heavily penalizes drivers due to overcrowding. Luckily I live near some really great public transportation and can get to pretty much anywhere in this city within an hour. But some of my friends have cars, and I have to seriously wonder what is the point of that. It seems you spend way more money on its upkeep than you even do on insurance and monthly notes. The other day my best friend blew out two of his tires (his fault for waiting until the last minute) and was told the third one was on its last legs as well. And the fourth tire was a used one he purchased a few years ago. Total cost of replacing all 4, plus labor and installation? Just under $1,000! The fuck? And that's just for tires. I don't even want to know what happens if you have a transmission leak.

To infinity ... and BEYOND!
Third: Working. I mean, besides the obvious of paying your bills and receiving your 401K retirement. But what's the point of working for someone else? How does this enrich your life? You spend more time at work than you do anything else in your lifetime, including sleeping. And at the end of it all when you're one foot in the grave, what do you have to show for it? Are you fabulously wealthy now? Did you improve humanity in any way? Did you save the world? Are future generations going to remember your name? Will even your great-grandkids? Probably not. No one will care about those spreadsheets you need to hand in by close of business the day after tomorrow. No one except your boss. And let's be honest: he could probably go screw himself with a sideways hammer!

Lastly: Dating. You're probably all thinking this was the whole point of this post, right? I'm not saying, but it does bear contemplating. What the hell is the point? After being in a relationship for 19 years only to have it crash and burn so spectacularly around me, I'm left wondering why I should even bother finding someone else to be with. Why? I thought I had already found "the one." The signs that something was wrong only really started 10 years into the relationship. Do I really want to go that long with someone else only to have it crash and burn all over again? You think I'm fucking nuts? I'm too cynical now for dating. I mean, how can I ever trust that this great feeling I have with someone new isn't just a set-up for tragedy a few years down the line? How will I ever know that this sweet, awesome person I'm falling in love with won't someday turn on me and rip my heart out of my chest like last time? I've already lost some (but not all) of the best years of my life. I can't afford to keep doing this over and over again. Yet, statistics tell me that I will have to date at least 7.35 women before I find the right one. And for some people, it takes a LOT more tries than that.

Baby, I hope in 10 years I won't want to throw you in this river.

So, I mean, really? What's the point?

Please tell me in the comments section below.


  1. Well, I guess if you follow this train of thought, you have to ask what's the point of anything?

    I don't have a belief in some higher purpose, so this is a tough one for me. My answer is to assign my own purpose to life, which is always to try to leave things a little better off than how I found them. Try to make sure the good in what I do outweighs the suckishness.

    I've lost many pets, and it hurts, but the joy they bring me outweighs the pain.

    I went without a car for many years when the disadvantages outweighed the benefits.

    And most of us are destined not to be remembered much beyond our years or to make a mark on history. If you see that as failure, then 99.99% of humanity are failures. That sounds wrong to me, so I choose to redefine success to avoid such a dreary fate. Bring joy to yourself and to those around you here and now. IMHO there is no finer point than that.

  2. Pets: Yes it's horribly hard to lose them but I'd never give up my four-legged companion. And, I've lost my share. But I will always have pets because love and loss go hand in hand.

    Next, great-grandkids? I'm lucky when my kids remember me. No really. But I love them and wouldn't trade them in either.

    Last dating. I hated it when I was young. People lie, cheat and break your heart-it's true. But nothing risked is nothing gained and what a wonderful thing you have to gain. Really. Hang in there.

  3. Ian -- You're right about that last point, and it's something I already know and do try to keep in mind. It's only important how we treat others we love and how we carry ourselves in this world.

    Kim -- Yeah, nothing risked is nothing gain. That's really the only real way to deal with the big bad world out there sometimes. Thanks for reminding me. :)

  4. Ugh, I'm right there with you on the "What's the point" pondering. But I don't stay in that frame of mind for long, or I don't "let" myself stay in that frame of mind for long. If I do, I'll break and I doubt that the broken pieces can be put back together. So, I allow myself a little time to feel this way and then I just stop it. I know you're not religious or anything, but I start praying. A lot. And it helps me. Perhaps you can focus on something that makes you feel better. Or more positive, when you feel this way. Look, I'm not a psychiatrist or anything like that, and I know that you know this, because you read my blog (ha!), but you've been through major life changes recently and it's going to take some time for you to full adjust and be "ok". Don't rush it.

    As for dating. I HATE dating. I really do, which is why I have just stopped. The last guy I THOUGHT might be a potential keeper, just played a houdini on me. So I've decided to just go out with friends and not date. Unless someone as hot as Robin Thicke asks me out, then all bets are off!

    You on the other hand, should date, and a lot. When and if you're ready. Scary? Sure. Might hurt? Sure. But you know what? Life is a gamble. We don't always win, but when we do, oh my, how sweet it can be. Don't deprive yourself the opportunities to new adventures. You never know friend, you never know.

    O.M.G., I can't seem to shut up. I've got the case of TOOMUCHWINE! hahaha

    bE GOOD!

  5. Yvonne -- Oh, you're so funny! This is why I love when you comment here. Thanks for the wonderful advice, my lovely friend. And I'm so sorry to hear about that last one. I had hoped he would be a keeper. There's never too much wine! I'm right there drinking with you! *raises glass of Burgundy*


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