Kraam! Where are duh too snakes faycing each udder?

I've been cracking up all afternoon to Youtube videos of pop culture movies and video games being placed to musical renditions. This one, based on the John Milius "Conan the Barbarian" movie from the 80s, is my fave so far! It's set to the melody of Basil Poledouris's moving soundtrack to the film. And oh damn, it's HILARIOUS! Especially the fake Ahh-nuld accent:





"AND HEAR THE LAMENTATION OF THE WOMEN!!!"  LOL! I can't get enough of that. :)

Granted, it's funnier if you've watched the movie before. And even more so if, like me, you've seen it like a bajillion times.

I have a short work week, so my weekend begins tomorrow. Enjoy yourselves!

Almost There . . .

As we get nearer and nearer to the April 1st season 2 premiere of Game of Thrones, more and more glimpses into what's in store for us fans are starting to leak out. Case in point, this awesome behind-the-scenes invitation which aired last night. Watch it below and weep, then dry your tears (of pure joy, of course!) and read what it is about this clip that makes me so giddy like a schoolgirl:

Well, well. Ain't that just something? I mean, WOW! There's so much awesome jammed into such a short video that I don't even know where to start.

It goes without saying that many of the reveals to geek out over in this clip only have real weight with those who have read the second book in the A Song of Ice and Fire series, "A Clash of Kings." But since I know so many fans of the show have not in fact also read the books, I will refrain from going into spoilery detail about what it is we're seeing. However, I will run down a list and commentary of all the cool character moments to be found in the clip:

1) Early on right off the proverbial bat, at the 0:12 mark, we see slain King Robert's youngest brother, Renly Baratheon, alongside his new bride Margaery Tyrell (played by Natalie Dormer of The Tudors fame). Renly was briefly shown a few times last season as part of King Robert's Small Council, but remembered most scandalously for his steamy spa, shaving, and "happy ending" scene with the dashing Knight of Flowers, Ser Loras Tyrell (Margaery's brother). So, um, needless to say this is going to make for one thorny situation should the wrong people learn of certain details. Add on top of that the little matter of Lord Renly vying for young King Joffrey's throne while insinuating that the little brat is really the product of his mother's incest, and . . . well, you'll see!

2) At the 0:42 mark, we briefly see Arya Stark sitting atop the battlements of Harrenhal. If you recall last season, Arya goes by the name "Arry" now and has disguised herself as a boy to escape the Queen's men who are searching for her. Yoren of the Night's Watch is leading her and a bunch of dungeon-scraping criminals north to serve on the Wall, accompanied by King Robert's bastard son, Gendry, who is himself being smuggled out of King's Landing to escape the Queen's wrath. And oh what a tangled plot we weave!

3) @ the 1:18 mark, we get our first and very brief glimpse of what I believe is Craster's Keep north of the Wall. This location plays a pivotal role in the future of the Night's Watch and the safety of its Rangers being led by Lord Mormont as they traverse through Wildling territory. Of course, all you really care about is that this location should feature lots of Jon Snow and Sam! Who doesn't want more Jon and Sam adventures, I ask you? While most of what goes on north of the Wall this season was filmed in Iceland, Craster's Keep itself was filmed in Ireland in pretty much the same location as the opening scene of last season's first episode. Iceland has no trees, and Craster's Keep would not be filmmable without them.

4) We get a quick glimpse of Davos Seaworth--aka, the "Onion Knight"--at the 1:34 mark. This is another new character to the show, and is Stannis Baratheon's right hand man. Which is funny since Davos is missing a few fingers on his own hand. Which is even funnier when you discover that it was Stannis himself who deprived him of those fingers. He's going to be AWESOME! Just take my word for it.

5) 1:36 gives us a very far away shot of Brienne of Tarth. Everyone's been waiting to get a glimpse of this character, as she is also new to the second season and is one of the few highborn ladies in the books who actually dons armor and kicks much ass! She's also being constantly ridiculed by everyone for not only fighting like a man, but looking like one as well. Let's say Brienne spends a lot of time getting shit on for her looks and demeanor, and this has not made Brienne a very happy lady Knight at all. Not at all. She's also in love with Lord Renly, whom she has sworn to protect. And oh yeah, she looks GREAT, btw! Spot-on as in the books! :)

6)  We get another glimpse of Melisandre, the Red Priestess, at the 1:38 mark just after Davos and Brienne. She's a bad mama-jamma, I'll just say. She's Stannis Baratheon's mysterious new adviser, bringing with her promises of the Iron Throne along with a new religion from the East. She'll also be responsible for some of the more scarier dark magic moments this season if they pull off a certain pair of scenes just right, I'm thinking. But I've already said too much--shhhhh!


7) We get to see the man himself, Lord Stannis Baratheon, at the 1:50 minute mark. The middle brother of the Baratheons, he holds the castle of Dragonstone after proving himself a formidable commander under his kingly older brother against both the old Targaryen Dynasty as well as Balon Greyjoy's failed rebellion a few years later. Now that Robert is dead, he believes that he himself, and not Lord Renly, is the rightful heir to the Iron Throne in light of current King Joffrey's illegitimacy issues. In addition to marshaling his forces against House Lannister and King's Landing, Lord Stannis must also contend with his younger brother's forces. Hence why the second book in this series is called "A Clash of Kings." There are many kings in this chapter, and they WILL be a-clashing!

8) Speaking of more kings . . . the King in the North, Robb Stark himself, can be glimpsed staring fondly at Jeyne Westerling @ the 2:03 mark. We only see the back of her here in this clip, but know that she will play a very key point in Robb's quest to gain support for his own campaign against the Iron Throne. He has the Kingslayer, Jaime Lannister, as his captive, and you best believe he intends to get satisfaction after what the Lannisters did to his father, Ned, in the first season. In fact, the very first episode of season 2 will be titled: "The North Remembers." Oh yes, that they do. And it is a very looooong memory.

9) And perhaps the most geekgasm moment of the entire video happens @ 2:15 -- Tyrion fucking Lannister holding up a vial of the volatile pyromancer's brew known as "wildfire!" Fans of the books know exactly where this will be going, and I really can't say anymore for fear of spoiling the awesome. But just know it is that, awesome!

"I have dreams of this show, you know? It's created a world in my head, it's . . . that I can't shake. Which is a testament of how good the show is."                                                                          -- Peter Dinklage

What an awesome quote to end the video with, eh? This is why Tyrion is the dude, because of this man right there! I've said it before but it bears repeating: look for Tyrion to have a much larger, intricate, and awesomer role this season. If you loved him last year, you should pretty much get double your fun this time around. I think the Emmy's and Golden Globes' folks are going to shit the proverbial brick when they realize they're just going to have to honor this actor a SECOND time all over again.

This is going to be fun!

And there you have it. Excited yet?

Well as if that isn't enough, we're almost at the point when the entire season 1 will be released to home video. In 2 weeks, as a matter of fact -- March 6th! I've already pre-ordered the Blu-rays long in advance, and so that weekend is going to involve a rewatching of EPIC proportions at my house. Oh how the walls shall shake!

And if you're thinking of getting the DVDs, fine. But just know that you might want to invest in a Blu-ray player instead. Click on this link and you'll find out why. Let's just say the Blu-rays give you a whole lot more bang for your bucks.

VALAR MORGHULIS!

To Boldly Go . . .

I'm going to pointedly ignore that today is that Hallmark-created holiday and instead tell you all what I did over the weekend.

Which is to say: nothing. Nothing much at all.

Ha! Wouldn't it be funny if that was my blog for the day. Just that?

Okay, perhaps not. Of course, I did do something. But that something involved sitting on my hind quarters and watching television for the most part. How EXCITING, huh? Hey, sometimes my weekends are like that . . . perfectly uneventful. I did get to finally crack open my complete Star Trek: The Original Series Blu-ray sets, though. I had these since Christmas and had meant to check them out back during my two-week hiatus then. But as you know, the best laid plans and all that jazz.

Anyway, I wasn't expecting much from this upgrade, as ST:TOS is not exactly my favorite of the Star Trek series. It is responsible for my whole-hearted love of all things science fictional, though, so it always commanded a healthy level of my respect. In fact, some of my earliest television watching memories are of this show from circa 1981 when I was only four years old. Most of my childhood, in fact, would be spent watching and rewatching every single syndicated episode until the show seriously began to get on my nerves. Still, when the Trek relaunch series "The Next Generation" premiered in the late 80s, I was reluctant to get into it due to the fact that, for me, the original crew was still the ONLY crew.

Of course, The Next Generation would quickly come to be one of my most favorite tv shows of all time -- so what the hell did I know back then, right?

Anyway, the original series has never looked better on Blu-ray! They went back and totally remastered the hell out of these episodes, to the point that I feel like I'm seeing them with new eyes. And they didn't just clean up the dirt and mend the scratches, no. They actually re-tooled all the outdated special effects as well!

Now, I know what some of you are thinking: BLASPHEMY! But hear me out, some of these changes are really good! I'm not a purist, though, so that could be it. I certainly did enjoy the remastered versions of the Star Wars films, for example. But in my opinion the original Star Trek series was seriously long in the tooth with these crappy effects. And now they look a lot better.

Check out the vid below which does a very quick overview of some of the many improvements. The first frame is taken from the 60s originals, while the second frame(s) of any comparison is from the newly remastered footage. You might want to use the pause button judiciously, though, to slow the speed of the comparisons down.

See what I mean? Now, yes, not all of the new effects look as snazzy as I would have preferred. In fact, some of them are too CGI-ey for my tastes. But overall I find that the textures are a vast improvement, not to mention that the obvious changes like the phaser beams and multi-directional camera views of the Enterprise make for a more dynamic immersion into the viewing experience. Especially from a modern sci-fi fan's point of view.

One of my favorite improvements occur in the classic episode, "The Corbomite Maneuver," when the U.S.S. Enterprise approaches the Fesarius ship. You can see it at the 2:27 mark in the above video clip if you pause it just in time. Or you can click on the image below to see a more detailed comparison:

The original shot is on the bottom, while the remastered block is on top. Check out those textured layers--WOW! Talk about a vast improvement, yo!

See, for all the grumblings on the net about how they shouldn't have messed with the purity of Roddenberry's vision, it's instances like this one that make the remastered version all the worthwhile to purchase for my collection. Since I'm a story-first kind of guy, as long as the core performances are kept intact I couldn't care less if the bells and whistles of the presentation are tinkered with. So much the better, I say!

Over the weekend I was able to watch the first 6 episodes of season one and find myself totally impressed. The transfer is simply GORGEOUS! It makes this fan squee uncontrollably at the thought of seeing my beloved ST:TNG get this same treatment later this year. I still haven't figured out when exactly they'll start rolling out those episodes on blu-ray, although a sampler disc of sorts was already released earlier this year. But I have no desire for a paltry taste -- I want the whole meal!

And so I will wait.

In the meantime, I have these TOS blu-rays to tide me over. And of course, Netflix streaming service for Deep Space Nine and Voyager rewatchings.

I do so love my Trek geekdom!

And so, how was your weekend? Scratch that: how's your Valentine's Day going? Oh come on, don't be like THAT! :)

The French Method Seems More Like My Method

 . . . At least, according to this book on child raising over there. I was reading this article on Yahoo today, Are French Women the New Tiger Mothers?:

"Parents used to look to doctors for advice on raising kids. Now they look to other countries. The latest contender for the world's best mom is from France. Author Pamela Druckerman's new book, Bringing Up Bébé: One American Mother Discovers the Wisdom of French Parenting, asserts that the Jerry Lewis-loving culture is better at raising children than Americans."

Needless to say this book must be filled with generalizations, but I admit I find the premise intriguing. According to the article, the "French" way seems to be perfectly in line with my idea of how I would raise my own children, were I to have any (and I'm not planning on it anytime soon).

I've always believed in the philosophy of my mother and grandmother, which is pretty much the old-fashioned adage that children should be "seen and not heard." In other words, children should know their place and never, ever talk back to adults. But, to be honest, I would simply settle for teaching them good manners. Wishful thinking, I know, since I don't yet have children and have no idea what it's really like to wrangle them in. Yet I've watched my sis-in-law with hers, and I'm impressed by how well my nieces and nephews are not just in public, but at home when we come to visit as well. And she's definitely not into this new-agey "let's be friends" style of parenting I see in the parks and on the sidewalks of posh neighborhoods here in NYC.

"But there are some things we can teach the world, too. 'American parents are known for putting their children first,' says Newman. 'As a result, children overall feel and know they're special.'"

Uh, yeah. I don't much care for this line of thought. I think kids are coddled too much these days. And if you make them feel *too* special, chances are they'll just grow up to be entitled dick wads expecting the world to fall to their knees at the slightest command. No thanks. We already have enough dick wads in this country to begin with. Let's not feed that, m'kay?

Anyway, yes, my views are easy to hold for someone without children. I've already established that. But what do the rest of you think? I'm eager to know.

I'm also kind of intrigued to read this book now. I don't for once buy into the conceit that the French are better parents than Americans. Or that you can even judge such a thing to begin with. But I would like to read more about what these differences are. I do believe in teaching children a more realistic view of the world, which is that life is pain and suffering and full of assholes.

Hey, it's how I was brought up. And I turned out okay. Uh . . . right?

Yeah, it might best if no one answers that! :)

Pictorial Of A Miracle Win

Wow, it's absolutely bananas here in New York City the day after that momentous win at Super Bowl XLVI!!!

You know, I feel bad for non-sports fans because it's like the whole damn media won't shut the hell up! I'm thrilled as all get-out that my Giants won, though, so it's hard for me to complain too loudly. But, yeah, I can see how this might be annoying to some. Were I a Pats fan, I would just refrain from watching tv or listening to the radio for the next week. It's better this way.

Anyway, the game for me was extremely good up until halftime. Then I started getting this sick feeling. I just felt . . . it was over for us! And that 3rd quarter was no help. I felt like I was on the worst roller-coaster ride of all time. Emotions all over the place!

For me, this game was more down to the wire than even 2008's Super Bowl. In that game, because of how expertly the G-Men dismantled the Pats' defense, I kinda had a feeling they were going to win. But this time? HELL NO! I came, I saw . . . I laughed, I cried, and finally I cheered!

But when all was said and done, I felt like lady luck was a NY fan on this night. I've already had heated discussions with other sports fan today who disagree with me, but I feel like we could have lost spectacularly in three key places were it not for blind, stupid luck:

1) If Mario Manningham doesn't catch that ridiculous 38-yard pass with some serious heat on his back

2) If Wes Welker--usually so clutch in situations like this--doesn't fumble that tricky, so crucial catch

3) And if, in the very last seconds of the game, Tom Brady's desperation Hail Mary connects with Aaron Hernandez

If either one of these three points had happened differently, I'd be singing a terrible song of woe, heartbreak, and despair this fine day.

But Lady Luck smiled down on us, for reasons no one will ever know. And I thank her. :) This win lifted my spirits like nothing else could, even though I usually don't let sports outcomes hold much sway over me. But this was different. I mean, this was BIG! I initially thought we had lost because I was on a DVR time delay and I didn't hear any wild cheering and carrying-on outside my windows in the streets below. It happened with the win over San Fran, after all. But I think the folks of the Bronx were simply too stunned to act out. And when I finally caught up with real time on the television, I understood why:

They did it. Those boys in blue DID IT!!! Twice in 4 years! Who the hell would have thunk it at the beginning of this season?

Anyway, tomorrow is going to be the big parade. Ugh! As much as I love this win for us, I happen to work directly on the same route these championship parades wander down. Worse, my office building is located just short of where the parade ends, so all the crowds congregate right where we are and block off any possible exits from our lobby. It's going to be a zoo out there tomorrow . . . makes a fella almost want to work from home.

Almost.

Naturally, I wouldn't miss it for the world! I'll try to take pics from the big communal corner window there if possible. It's going to be nice to hear some positive chanting and crowd demonstrations so close to Wall Street for a change.

Happy Monday, folks. I certainly couldn't have asked for a better start to the week. WOOO-HOOOOOOO!!!!!

Are You Ready For Some FOOTBALL?!!!

Today is the big day, oh yes!

So here we are. I can't say I knew this would happen. I distinctly recall at the beginning of the season saying that my team didn't have a chance in hell of making it past the regular season, let alone the Big Dance. Yet here they are, and I couldn't be more stoked!

I've been avoiding social media all day so as not to run into all the too-boisterous fans of either team. Actually, I wanted to avoid the naysayers the most. I have a few of them on my friends list, all locals. Or rather, I should say, recent transplants to NYC from other locales throughout the U.S. For some reason these people--almost to the last woman--feels the need to loudly talk trash about the home team and root for that OTHER squad instead.

The hell is up with that?

I'm not saying you're required to root for my team or shut up . . . but have a little respect at least. These people always come across as extremely butt-hurt that *their* hometown team didn't make it to February. And because they know they now live among the "hated enemy" of New York sports fans, they feel the need to denigrate our collective festive spirit into vile negativity.

Well, I'm not having it today! So I've banned Facebook for the duration of the night. Maybe I'll check in tomorrow morning when the dust clears.

In the meantime, I'm about to get my 4-mile run in for the day before settling down to the game with some fresh fruit and a protein shake. Yeah, I'm sorry to say . . . but that's how I roll! :) I'm in what I call "training mode" for the past 3 months or so, whereby I have a strict workout and dietary regimen to get all lean, mean, and fit. I do this every other three months, with my off months being a more relaxed eating and exercise schedule, but still health conscious all the same. As such, I won't be pigging out on barbecue and chips during tonight's extravaganza as is traditional, but I will still enjoy myself.

And who knows, maybe the wife will sneak in a pizza when I'm not looking. And then, you know . . . who could blame me for joining in, right? I mean, you can't let a perfectly good pizza go to waste, can you? There might be buffalo wings involved, too, I hear. What's a guy s'posed to do, I ask ya?

By the way, sorry for being M.I.A. this weekend on most of your blogs (you know who you are). Unfortunately, I had to attend the funeral of a very close family member and these past two days has been a restless nightmare for me. I slept for 12 hours straight last night, I was so tired! Woke up late this morning (or early afternoon) feeling a whole lot better, but still I have this lingering sadness hanging over me. My wife, too. I've been to far too many of these in my short life, and unfortunately I know I will have to go to a lot more before my time eventually comes.

Sorry for the turn toward the morbid. I've been thinking about life and death and all that fun stuff these past 48 hours or so. I'll be fine, but I just need some time. Needless to say I haven't been online much since about Thursday, so please bear with me.

Tonight's game will be more for distraction and relaxation. Whatever the outcome, I intend not to take it too seriously. In fact, I find that I wouldn't be too upset if the other team wins. Not because I want my team to win any less . . . but because they are a tough opponent and have the better record. And because we kinda embarrassed them that last time 4 years ago, so there's that whole revenge undercurrent going on. As a writer, I do so much love a good revenge story!

So, good luck to the fans of both sides tonight. Either way, it plans to be a great show of athleticism and sportsmanship (one hopes). May the best team win.

Have a good one!

April Is Coming!

Yes sir! A full teaser trailer for the 2nd season of HBO's Game of Thrones aired last night before the premiere of their new show, Luck. And here it is below for all your viewing pleasure:




(If the above clip is too choppy or cannot be viewed properly, click on this link for the YouTube version.)

How stoked are you now? If you're like me, then the answer is: FLLBBPT@$!#!!!! Oh, sorry about that. It's hard to talk when you're drooling so much. But BY THE SEVEN! That looked friggin AWESOME! I love how that sneaky fat eunuch, Varys, can't help himself from hinting at what's really going on behind the scenes of this continents-spanning game of power. But if he thinks Tyrion is one to be cowed or awed by such hintings, then the Master of Whispers has seriously underestimated the dwarf. Or has he?

Although this next season will only cover Book 2 (and perhaps even parts of Book 3, I hear), Varys' words in this trailer echo some pretty amazing plot turns that occur much later in the series. If you haven't read as far as Book 5 yet, not knowing what I'm referring to won't be a big deal. Although, I do have to say that inklings of the spy master's true role in all the political machinations afoot in this series has already been revealed in the first season. So it's probably no surprise to anyone that the bald fucker has more of a hand in things than someone of his station should. And if you've read Book 2 already, you know he and Tyrion will make for interesting "bed fellows" during the full-on shit storm to come this season.

Oh, trust me: It's going to be glorious! :)

Season 2 of Game of Thrones will air Sunday, April 1st, only on HBO!

Another Great Advantage Of The Season

Or, why I love winter . . . Reason # 12 (or something like that). I should really compile them all into a list one of these days.

But, anyway, as I was getting dressed to head out to work this morning, I was reminded once again about one of the many advantages of the cold, dark months of winter. The primary advantage for me, of course, is being able to work out excessively and not drip buckets full of sweat in the process.

But another convenience is getting dressed in the morning.

Nothing is easier than throwing on a sweater over some slacks or jeans, a big coat over that, and heading right out the door. In the winter time, no one is paying much attention to what you wear. And even if they are, you're wearing a big coat anyway -- so who's to know?

This is why I love it this time of year! Here in New York City, summer time is a pain in the ass in more ways than one. But one of the biggest peeves of mine is that too many people take the warmer months as an opportunity to model their wardrobes. It's kind of perverse how bad it gets here. On the subway, you get sized up from head to toe by pretty much every pair of eyes. Not because people are so nosy (although, insatiable human curiosity is certainly part of the blame), but because sitting on the subway waiting to arrive at your stop is supremely BORING! And, hey, checking out your fellow passengers is better than peering at that Citibank poster board for the umpteenth time, right? At least, that seems to be true of most MTA riders. I personally just read an e-book or close my eyes for the duration of my trip.

So in the summer time around here, everyone is in your business. And this means you must constantly be aware of what you're wearing. Mismatched color schemes or wrinkles can be covered up by a jacket during the colder months. But in the dog days of summer . . . you must step correct. Clothes need to be ironed and set -- and things need to MATCH!

I hate putting effort into the way I dress. It's the last thing I want to be doing. I hate clothes shopping, and even more clothes CHOOSING! But when you live in a big city where you are forced to interact daily with the press of humanity, there's a certain pressure to maintain at least a semblance of decorum about your person. For those of you who have the luxury of driving to and from work in the solitude and privacy of your own vehicle, you have my eternal envy. I'm pretty anti-social, so subway commuting in the big city is a major annoyance to me. And I have to do it EVERY. SINGLE. DAY! Twice, in fact. Both ways! And summer time only cranks up that exasperation factor by twenty.

But here in January? No one cares. Everyone's too cold to notice what you're wearing. It's too dark in the morning, anyway. And that's right where I belong. I thrive best in environs where people ignore one another and go about their own business, just as it should be. And here in NYC, only during this brief window of December to March can you achieve such a perfect anti-social balance in a city populated by 8 million narcissistic souls.

Also, winter clothes never need to be ironed. Hallelujah! As long as you fold them nicely, or set them on hangers the night before, sweaters stay perfect no matter what! And, of course, there's always the big overcoat to hide it all anyway, as I've already mentioned. This means that I spend all of three minutes in the morning getting dressed for work -- which is HUGE, don't you know? It's literally the least amount of effort you can possibly expend to look passably decent. And that suits me just fine, pardon the pun. :)

Chillin, Kicking Back A Few . . .

And by "chillin" I of course mean that literally!

It seems a few of you were more interested in the part of the cruise where my wife and I hung out at the onboard ice bar, so I figured I'd talk about that unique experience some more.

Aboard the Norwegian "Epic," among the many different distractions like the casino and two (count 'em) 3-lane bowling alleys--not to mention all the other bars and themed cocktail lounges--is a Svedka-sponsored joint called the Ice Bar.

It's basically a huge walk-in freezer setup to resemble the inside of a glacier . . . or maybe Superman's Fortress of Solitude, you take your pick. After paying the cover charge, you're handed a pair of woolen gloves, shown a rack containing parkas lined with fake fur, and then led through the bunker-like door before having it slammed shut behind you and bolted.

Yes, bolted. I shit you not.

You then pass through a second metallic door and some plastic flaps and come upon this scene:

As you can see, it's quite an experience. Amid the ice-block seats and sculptures of Vikings and polar bears, you have a bar tended by one guy wearing a fur cap and surrounded by bottles of Svedka vodka.

The specialty drinks are presented on a menu atop the counter as you first enter the place. Since blue is my favorite color, I naturally went with the Cobalt Blue as my first drink. The image is a bit blurry above, I know, but the ingredients for this drink are: Inniskillin Icewine, Vodka, and Blue Curacao -- in case any of you playing at home would like to make your own.

All drinks were served in specially formed ice chalices, which serves double duty as a holder for your drink as well as chilling the contents. Ahhhh! I have to admit, it was quite delish! Even if I couldn't feel my lips or tongue beyond the third sip.

The poor bartender had to keep ducking in and out of the establishment as I could imagine standing in a 0-degree freezer for minutes on end is not a particular fun job to do. I myself lasted a whole fifteen minutes in the place before I, too, had to bow out. But I was wearing long pants and a button shirt at the time, while others there were in shorts and sandals. And even after we left for the night, I have to admit my fingers were still numb a half hour later from gripping those blasted icicle cups! Brrrrrr!

It was a fun experience, though. I would very much love to go to one again, particularly in the summer time here in New York. I have to research that, because I'm sure there must be one here in this big ole city. Something to keep in mind when those dog days of August arrive, eh?

Hope you all are having a great Sunday. I know I am -- my Giants are going to the SUPER BOWL!!! Fun for me, but most likely dull for the rest of the country not part of the Northeast right now. I mean, talk about a broken record! :)

But yes, life is good. Night, everybody!

A Study In Extremes

So, I'm back. Miss me?

We just got in a few hours ago, and I'm pretty beat. But just wanted to say that this last week spent traipsing across the western portions of the Caribbean was a blast! Lisa and I had tons of fun, tons of sun . . . and tons of FOOD! Oink, oink!

As per usual upon returning from a cruise (and we've been on THREE now!), it's kinda hard getting used to not being waited on hand and foot, and to not having copious amounts of food and drink being shoved in your direction at all hours of the day and night. You'd be surprised how fast you can get accustomed to such kingly treatment.

But alas, all good things must come to an end. We're back in the mean ol' boogie-down Bronx tonight, and boy the differences could not be any more extreme! See, we left behind daily temps in the upper 70s and low 80s, with vistas such as these:

(That's the island of St. Martin, btw) . . . Only to have the airplane descend through the clouds over New York City today and reveal the following landscape spread out below us:

Wow! Talk about a slap in the face back to reality, eh? We went from perfect beach weather every day of the week, to 25 degrees and 5 inches of freshly fallen snow on the ground. Brrrr!

I took the pic above right through the airplane's window as we flew over Far Rockaway on approach to JFK airport. And once landed and through the terminal, was met with the most intense, meat-freezer like temperatures I've ever felt. And this from the guy who has an unnaturally high tolerance for the cold. Wow! Guess all that beach and Mai Tai drinks went to my head.

Although, it wasn't all warmth and sunshine while we were away. Our cruise ship had an onboard ice lounge, whereby patrons donned wool gloves and [faux] fur-lined parkas before stepping through a freezer door into a bar and lounge comprised almost entirely of ice! The thermometer hovered on or just above 0 degree Fahrenheit. How's that for COLD??? Lisa couldn't stand three minutes of it before having to bail. I myself loved it! I had three arctic-inspired beverages in specially designed ice-cube chalices. Yes, these were glasses made from frozen water! You could feel the bone-numbing coldness seep through the wool gloves, people! It was so cold that my lips became numb after just a few sips, and as a result some of my drink dribbled down my chin and onto the parka. What a clutz!

Still, I'll leave you with this blurry iPhone pic of me toasting the Icelandic gods of ice and . . . er, more ice. Skål, everybody!

Some of you on Facebook have already seen these pics, but I should be posting up a host of others shortly. In the meantime, I hope you all behaved in my absence, and that your week was a great one too! I'll try to update more deets about our trip in the days to come.

Rejection . . . And An Unexpected Surprise

Ugh!

I've been so flustered lately (for reasons I won't go into here) that I've forgotten all about blogging. And then, I woke up this morning to find a rejection letter waiting in my inbox for one of my more recent short stories I submitted over a month ago. But that's the breaks, I guess. I'm in the middle of putting the finishing touches on yet another short story, so I'll find another place to submit the rejected one before finishing up that one.

And then I get back to work on the ongoing novel. Phew! The life of a part-time writer who still has to work a 9-5 every day, eh? Now you know why finding the right amount of time to blog can be so crucial. At least to me.

Anyway . . . I have some unexpected news. Remember back when I said I was contemplating my very first sci-fi  convention in Boston next month? Sure you do, I mentioned it right here! Well, turns out that I won't be making it to that after all. Boooo! I know, right?

But the reason why, is . . .

We're going on a cruise! And I mean, as in right now!!! Well, okay, not RIGHT NOW, right now. But in less than two days! Holy crap, why such short notice? Well, I only just found out yesterday and needless to say I've been in a whirlwind trying to get things ready--including  having to let my boss know I would need to take an immediate leave for all of next week. Whoa! Thank god I have an awesome boss, and that I am an awesome employee who usually never ever does things like this. So everything worked out fine and my leave request was quickly and painlessly granted.

But yes, we're going on a cruise. I won't go into the details of how this fortune came upon me, but suffice to say that my wife did all the planning and neglected to tell me until the last minute. Surprise, surprise! But as far as they go, this is a good one. If you recall, I was just mentioning how I thought I might plan a beach vacation sometime for later this month. Well, looks like I was beaten to the punch!

And where will we be going? Well, let me not get ahead of myself. First, this is the cruise ship we will be sailing on:

It's Norwegian Cruise Line's "Epic," one of their largest--if not THE largest--vessels in their fleet. In fact, it's so large that it belongs to a new class of cruise ship called "megaliners," and can carry as many as 4,100 passengers. *gulp* That's a helluva whole lot of people!

We'll be leaving from Miami this Saturday afternoon for a 7-day tour of the Eastern Caribbean:

As you can see by the map, our first stop will be in Philipsburg, Sint Maarten -- which is the Dutch sister country to the French colonized St. Martin, situated on the same island and to the north.

After spending a day there, we'll sail west nor'west to St. Thomas in the U.S. Virgin Islands.

And then our last port of call after that will be the Bahamas. I hear Norwegian has their own private island there, but if time allows I will endeavor to hit up Atlantis Resort and give it a quick look-see. Or maybe not. When in the Bahamas, I prefer more out of the way and laid back locales. Atlantis is a huge tourist trap, but as such it might be worth seeing what all the fuss is about.

In-between it all, we'll be spending approximately 3 days completely at sea. If you've ever been on a cruise before, you know that sea days can be brutally boring if your ship is lacking on the entertainment side and is too crowded. Luckily, I get the feeling we won't have to deal with too many large families and kids. I'm not aware of January being a terribly popular vacation period for families, especially given the fact that kids are still in school. I've never been on vacation during the winter months, though, only the summer. So needless to say I'm going to be thrilled if I don't have to deal with the usual HORDES of annoying, screaming kids and bratty, sulky teenagers. Oh, I so hope that is the case!

But, anyway, it's not like we won't have our distractions. Epic seems to be fully prepared for long sea days, as evidenced by their many on-board venues and amenities. I've only done a casual perusal of what's on offer, but here's what I found thus far:

Can you believe that? A huge outdoor theater, a water park, and--GASP!--is that a freaking bowling alley? Double-you Tee Eff? How big is this ship, anyway? Of course, we've been on huge cruise liners before, so none of this should really be all that surprising to me. Still, I seriously doubt we'll be left wanting for things to do. On top of this, I'll be bringing along my laptop to get some writing done.

As you can see our cabin has a balcony, so I plan on sitting out there in the morning hours and getting a few hundred words in before the sun is directly overhead and I head up to the weather deck for some lounging and reading!

Ah, what a life! I anticipate my most difficult decision will be whether or not to wear shorts or trousers to dinner . . . and, do I really need that second dessert?

Because, oh, it is SO ON! :)

Fear not, though. I'll be sure to take plenty of pics while we're gone, and perhaps even a vid or two. We'll be back a week from this Saturday, but I can't rule out a possible quick blog update or two in the interim. Personally, I wouldn't hold my breath on that if I were you. But stranger things have happened on our excursions . . .

In the meantime, you can peruse the Facebook photo albums from our previous two cruises here and here if it suits you. No pressure, though.

I hope you all have a pleasant weekend and following week. I'll try not to come back with too deep of a tan! :)

Take Away My Sun, Give Me The Snow!

Over at the Economic Disconnect, my good friend GYSC relates the tale of why he dislikes winter. It's a great story, and you should head on over there to read it. I have to admit, he gives a pretty good reason for hating the season.

But me? I absolutely *love* the winter. If I had my way, I would live somewhere up in Maine or the frozen wilds of Canada, even. As far away from people as possible. I'm a recluse like that. Also, I find that the cold weather has this habit of civilizing people to the point where they behave like normal human beings. I suppose this comes from living in New York City all my life. Especially in the congested urban blight that is the Bronx where I grew up, where people practically live on top of each other and crime, as a result, is rampant. The only time this place gets decent is when the temps dip below freezing. Then everyone stays the hell indoors and learn to mind their business. Trust me, no one starts trouble around here in the months of January through March. It's glorious!

I was reminded of this very fact tonight as I was walking home. I took a shortcut through the city park across the street from my building, and not a single soul was out. I had the entire park to myself! The trees were bare and ghostly all around me--the air so crisp--and I could hear my own footfalls echo across the expanse. It was surreal, and even beautiful if you can believe it. And the biting cold just made me feel so ALIVE! This is why I love winter, I thought. This right here. When else do you get to be so alone and feel so great smack dab in the middle of the South Bronx?

The park, devoid of less hearty souls than I! (Yankee Stadium in the background)

Summer time is horrendous here. In the months of July and August, that same park has literally 80 - 120 people at all times just loitering about, talking late into the morning hours, playing craps and dominoes, shooting off firearms at random moments (yes, this DOES happen), and just generally making the park an unpleasant place to walk through.

But not now. Now, when the temps are in the low 20s F, and the windchill is in the single digits, the neighborhood is calm and at peace. And I find my mood reflecting that.

Like my friend GYSC, I have my own winter tale of caution to tell as well. When you read it, you'll wonder how I could ever love the season as much as I do.

See, I was in the Boy Scouts once. Rose all the way to the rank of Scout First Class before finally quitting around the age of 15. But this one time when I was 13, my troop decided to go camping in the woods in the middle of January. Yes, that's right: JANUARY! It was to attend some Scouts version of the winter Olympics, by which a bunch of local troops gather in the woods and compete at various skill-based competitions. First Aid and Rescue, Knot Tying, Shelter Building, Snow-Shoe Assembly (oh yes), Map & Compass use, and even Tracking. We sign up and participate in all these events in the attempt to earn our relevant merit badges.

Sounds great, right? Except, we were all kids from the inner-city ghetto. We didn't know shit about tracking through the woods. WTF? Still, our little Bronx troop of misfits tried our best. We didn't win anything, but at least we tried.

Here's where things get interesting, though. See, we had to set up our own lodging of course. Which meant constructing lean-tos and unrolling our sleeping bags inside them. Plain and simple. Problem is, I came woefully ill-equipped for that last part. Whereas everyone else somehow had these specially insulated winter sleeping bags--or "mummy bags" as we called them--I could only afford the thin, warm weather variety. My friends nicknamed it a "desert bag," since the desert is probably the only place such a pathetic excuse of a sleeping bag might work.

I've never been so cold in all my life! And to make matters worse, on that first night it started to snow. And continued snowing. By the time morning came around, we were all buried under 8 inches of snow! Yes, here we were in the middle of the woods in New Jersey while a damn blizzard was raging around us. We accumulate around 4 more inches before noon when the storm finally stopped. I don't think I ever once stepped out of my full winter gear, even to use the latrine. Hell, I even slept in my coat and mountain boots!

We managed to still have fun, though. That's what I remember the most. The bunch of us collecting firewood, running through drifts of snow, playing capture the flag and king of the mountain. I busted my knee slipping on a covered boulder while running through the woods once, but for some reason I got right back up and continued to chase after the rest of the troop. It really was like we were the Lost Boys out there.

But by the time the weekend came to a close, I was feeling the pain. Not even my glove warmers were doing the trick anymore. And I was wearing two pairs! I remember the troop packing up and hiking the long trail back down to the Ranger's station and parking lot. We stumbled along like zombies, none us able to feel our toes. And carrying all that gear on our backs sucked!

But then we made it, and I remember having a hot chocolate at the trading post while waiting for my aunt to come pick me up. Yes, we were too poor of a troop to afford organized transportation even. But somehow that only made the experience more endearing. When I came home, I took the longest, most decadent hot bubble bath of my life! I soaked in the tub for HOURS, submerged up to my nose, and still the warmth didn't seem to reach my bones. After continuing to run the hot water from the faucet for a while, it finally happened. But damn if I'll never forget that feeling of everlasting cold. BRRRRRR!

Yet despite all that, I loved it! I tell you right now I would do it all over again. I think something happened that weekend out there in the barren woods. For, from that moment on, I was always impervious to the cold. When I went away to Vermont for college, I would develop an even higher tolerance for the cold. Nowadays, no matter how cold it gets here in the city, it can never ever be THAT cold. This is nothing. I can do temps in the teens and twenties in my sleep. Ho-hum!

That all being said, I find myself thinking the impossible lately. I find myself contemplating taking a vacation to the Bahamas later this month. I know it won't really happen, but I can hope. My wife and I have this one perfect little island we like to go to there, and right about now it sounds just about DIVINE. Not because I need to escape the cold, but because I've never taken a beach holiday in the winter. Every time we go to the Caribbean, or some other near tropical locale, it always seems to be in the summer time. For once I would like to experience the novelty of getting on the plane where it's below freezing, and getting off where the people are wearing shorts and t-shirts and sipping mai-tais. :)

Sounds nice, doesn't it? Maybe we might do just that!

Maybe.

Channeling Crazy Dreams Into Creative Projects

About a month ago I posted this update here about one of my short stories that had been based on a strange, Vicodin-fueled dream of mine. And although I never did sell the damn thing, I still consider it one of my better tales.

Well, looks like I've been inspired by Mr. Sandman all over again. Just, this time, minus the drugs.

Last night I had a pretty wicked dream, one that unfolded like a Stephen King story. It wasn't as wild and deranged as you might expect though, but I thought it to be quite interesting nonetheless. I woke up from it in the early morning hours before the sun had even risen. It was such a great idea for a story that I jumped out of bed and rushed into our den to dictate the dream into my iPhone.

But something told me to sit down and power up the PC, which I did. And instead of reciting the bare bones of a cool sci-fi/horror blend short story, I ended up cranking out a full-fledged outline in quick hand without pause. When I was done, I sat back and blinked, surprised that the sun had risen in the meantime. Whoa, that was intense! Somehow I had managed to perfectly capture the main essence of the dream, while at the same time roughing out the skeleton of a compelling 3-part narrative in the process.

I felt shocked. I felt proud. I felt . . . AMAZING! I went back to my pillow with a smile, but was too excited thinking about plot points to resume sleep.

Has this ever happened to you writers out there? Isn't it the most incredible feeling, like, EVAR?

When eventually I did get up for the day and finished eating breakfast, I immediately locked myself away in the den and proceeded to pound out 1,000 words of the initial draft. I get the feeling this will be one of my shorter tales, so it's possible I'm already 1/4th of the way through. It certainly feels like I'm moving along nicely. After I finish the first draft and maybe a second, I'll return to that ever progressing novel of mine. Don't worry, that's still moving along nicely. I'm not neglecting it.

I love writing!

Anyway, switching to different gears . . . if you notice my "Now Playing" sidebar on the right of the page, I've started up that game I mentioned a few months back:

I've been heavily invested in this title pretty much since the very moment I slid the disc into my Playstation 3 last week. I didn't think I would get drawn in so completely by it, but I did. The story just sucked me in LIKE THAT! This is why I love the end of the year. I get to choose from among all the great titles I didn't have time to try out during the year, and pick the one that looks like it will be the most fun. This Christmas season, as it was back in 2009, that game turned out to be an Uncharted title. And in this adventure, Nathan Drake and his compatriots travel from the London underground (literally), to a run-down medieval estate in France, to a Crusades-era castle in Syria, and now to the Arabian desert. All in search of a forgotten city of treasure lost beneath the sands.

This, for me, is the type of stuff that fuels my dreams. Which in turn fuels my writing. It's a neat "circle of life" approach to creativity, don't you agree? And I wouldn't have it any other way.

Now if I can only discipline myself to write when I need to write, and play when I need a break. But that's every writer's dilemma, I know. :)

Tomorrow I return to work since being gone for two weeks. I'm actually looking forward to a return to my normal schedule. Funny how that happens, huh?

Have a great week, guys!

How Bout Them G-Men, Eh?

Well, this was an awesome night for my NY Giants. Way to go, Big Blue!!! Sucks to be a fan of any Texas-based team this Sunday, but sometimes that's just the way the cards are dealt. But at least one of your teams is still going to the playoffs, Texas. Us New York football fans--with (count 'em) THREE pro teams to root behind--are certainly no stranger to drawing all blanks come the post-season.

But not this year. Oh no, 2012 is already starting off to a promising start. What a happy New Year, indeed! :)

It's funny, because at the start of the season I had that OTHER New York team heading to the post--those Jets. I am and always will be a Giants fan, though, so in my heart of hearts I secretly wished that they would be the ones to pull it off. And boy did I get my wish!

And you can't write them off as a fluke, either. I mean, their offense is really starting to look dangerous out there, folks! I mean *really* dangerous. It's too early yet, and I don't want to jinx things . . . but, yeah. I'll just leave it at that. But you know that saying about waking the sleeping giant, right? 'Nuff said.

They face Atlanta next week. Will be a tough game, but one that will be on our home turf. The Giants are pretty confident at home, so this could end up being one for the ages. If somehow they make it through and have to face the Packers next, though, I think I might have to take the week off sick as I'm going to possibly pass out from nerves.

But in the meantime, hey -- FIRST BLOG ENTRY OF THE NEW YEAR! w00t!

Have a good night, everybody.

That Time Of Year Again

Hi folks.

I've been gone a loooong time from the blogs, I know. Sorry about that. I usually get scarce this time of year, as I'm rarely online when I'm on staycation. How's that for irony, huh?

So this means I haven' blogged or read blogs in all this time. And I therefore apologize for my lack of comments, people. Nothing personal, okay?

Anyway, I hope you all are having a good wrap-up to the year. 2011 was not a nice year to me, and to be honest I can't wait for it to be done with already. But I hope the rest of you have had a better year. And even if yours sucked as much as mine did, let us join forces and wish really hard that we ALL have a fantastic 2012!!!

As some of you already know, the end of the year is never a good time for me. New Year's Eve is when my mother was taken from us, as I've already chronicled here and here before. So it's not a happy, merry ol' time for me or my family. We tend to be very low-key on this night, watching the ball drop on Times Square from the comfort of our living rooms, but not much else. I can only remember one time since my mother's passing that I've gone to a NYE party, and that was mostly to take my mind off depressing thoughts than anything else.

Still, don't let me spoil the fun and merry hijinks of this night. I wish you all the best . . . auld lang syne, and all that jazz. May you have a prosperous and joyous 2012.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

A Brief History Lesson, Game Of Thrones Style!

So how was your weekend? Mine was fine, filled with a lot of writing done on the ongoing practice novel . . . but also much wailing and gnashing of teeth over the performance of my NYC-area NFL teams. Grrrrr! Way to eff up my Sunday, Giants and Jets! But at least I got to see the Pats embarrass the Broncos. Was looking forward to that the most, actually. And Tom Brady delivered!

Anywho . . .

Got a nice surprise over at Winter Is Coming.net this morning. Seems they received a specially made press-kit from HBO bearing the sigil of House Stark, and packed with all sorts of goodies for the upcoming home video release of the 1st season of Game of Thrones.  You can click on the link to see what was in the kit, but I'm going to embed a special video below which was taken from the Blu-ray box set. The clip is part of one of the many special features, this one consisting of 24 videos pertaining to various aspects of Westerosi life, culture, and history -- and each containing sketch-art animation with narration provided by various members of the show's cast. This particular one details the religious institutions of Westeros, and is narrated by both Michelle Fairley (Catelyn Stark) and Isaac Hempstead-Wright (Bran Stark). This brief history of the dual religions which came to dominate Westeros is information that was spread out in bits and pieces throughout the books, but which is very handy for newcomers to get all in one place like this. Watch for yourselves and enjoy:





I'm impressed. And also, highly excited to get my hands on my own Blu-ray set this March! I'm going to watch all 24 vids as if they're a History Channel doc. It's going to be AWESOME, I just know it!

Batista's 10 Contrarian Rules To Life

I've overcome many obstacles to get to where I am today. Those who know me already know the long of it, so I won't bore you with the details about my chaotic childhood. But do you wanna know a little secret I utilized to get through some of the tougher periods of uncertainty and doubt?

Simple: I did the opposite of what everyone else was doing!

It sounds like a an odd thing to say, right? But somehow it worked! I got through high school, for instance, by taking a look around me and realizing that I didn't want to be like all those other kids I saw because they were obviously headed in a very bad direction. So instead of hanging out, chasing girls, and seeking attention -- I stayed indoors, studied my ass off, and generally avoided people. Getting out of the inner city is really tough when the odds are stacked against you. Even more so if you don't come from a solid nuclear family who's members emphasize working hard to succeed. It's a vicious cycle! I simply did what I had to do to break out.

So, this is when I came up with my "opposite" rule. Do the opposite of what is undesirable, and perhaps you'll achieve that which is desirable.

It worked for me! Well, so far at least.

So, then, here are the 10 most crucial observations I've made about various aspects of this world that should really be obvious to most, but is sometimes not. Generally speaking, doing the complete opposite of these things will make you an all-around better person. These are my "Anti-Asshole" rules, in effect.

Ready?


1)  Those who constantly talk about how smart they are, usually are not. (So don't be like that)

2)  If it's easy money, it's illegal money. True financial reward can only come from working hard and smart.

3)  The man who talks the loudest usually has the least of interest to say. (So speak softly and carry a big stick!)

4)  If your charity needs to be acknowledged by others, then it is not true charity. (The anonymous donation is genuine)

5)  If you begin a sentence: "I'm not racist, but . . ." You are most likely racist.

6)  If you have to say: "My gay friend is coming to the party." You are most likely a bigot.

7)  The popular girl in school has the most admirers, but the least friends. (Cherish your unpopularity)

8)  Angry people die young. (Don't worry, be happy)

9)  Fervent patriotism is not always a good thing. (Hitler was the ultimate patriot)

10) Pride is the ugliest human emotion. No one's ever donned a hood and bombed a church over "humble" power.


I'm sure I could go on and on, but these 10 are a good start. Thinking like this has prevented me from committing some spectacular failures in my lifetime. It also grants me the occasional immunity to "foot-in-mouth" disease.

Useful, that.

If anyone wants to add to the list, feel free to do so in the comments section below.

G.I. Joe Done Right!

So, I don't think I've talked about it much here . . . but I hated that live-action G.I. Joe film that came out 2 years back: The Rise of Cobra. It wasn't a spectacular fail of my 80s childhood by any means (I liked it a lot better than the Michael Bay Transformers movies, for example), but it still left a lot to be desired by this fan.

Well, looks like that might all be changing when the sequel hits theaters next summer. At least, going by the recently released trailer, that is. Check it out below for yourselves:





Whoa! I like! I like it very, very much. I don't know how this is possible, but in some ways this one little trailer alone is far better than the entire 2009 film. HOLY HELLS! And yes, yes . . . I know that Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson is now in this as "Roadblock," and that all the talk is about Bruce Willis's surprise cameo as the original "Joe" -- General Joe Colton. That's all cool and all. And, in fact, Willis's delivery at the end of the trailer is just damn hilarious!

But forget all that! Do you know who I'm excited to see in this movie the most? My favorite ninja girl -- Jinx!

You spot her a few times in the trailer with the red blind fold. She's a scion of the famed ninja clan, the Arashikage, and is a disciple of the one and only "Blind Master" (played by the RZA, of all people) -- hence her "blind" fighting style, which I just think is the epitome of AWESOME!

I first fell in love with this character in the original G.I. Joe cartoon movie released back in 1987. She was part of the new rookie recruits known as the "Rawhides", trained by "Beach Head." In fact, one of my all time favorite scenes in the movie is when Beach Head gives her a hard time and tests her to see if she's got what it takes to join his team. Check out the clip below, which I'm sure will bring back tons of memories to you fellow 80s kids out there! :)





They just don't do animation this well anymore, do they?

And, oh how I love this scene! And from this point on, little 10-year old me was a die-hard Jinx fan! I would even dare say I had a huge crush on her. *blushes*

So, imagine how pleased I was to find out that the talented and beautiful French actress, Elodie Yung, would be playing her in the film. Are you serious? SCORE!!!! To be sure, I only know her previously from the movie, District 13: Ultimatum -- but she was one of the more memorable presences in that otherwise forgettable film.

Yeah, I think she might just work out fine!

G.I. Joe 2: Retaliation is currently slated for release on June 29, 2012 -- the weekend before Independence Day here in the States. I, for one, will be there opening day!

Winter Is Still Coming . . .

. . . And the Cold Winds are Rising.

Eh? Not as strong a tagline as I would have liked, but I'll take it. Even if it was never uttered in the books. Anyway, THE DAY HAS ARRIVED. Finally, after so long a wait, the first teaser with any actual footage has been aired for the next season of HBO's Game of Thrones! It aired just before the season finale of Boardwalk Empire last night, and it was GLORIOUS!

Watch it for yourself below, and I'll comment afterwards:




“My brother left no trueborn heirs.
By right, and birth, and blood,
I do this day lay claim,
To the Iron Throne of Westeros.
Let all true men declare their loyalty.
The Iron Throne is mine by right.
They will bend the knee,
Or I will destroy them.
The cold winds are rising.”


Whoa! We only get to see a small amount of new footage, but it was enough to whet this fan's appetite. How about you?

I feel I need to provide a little context for what was just seen, though, as I think it might be difficult to follow for those who are not readers of the books. Or for those to whom the last season is a barely remembered blur. Heh, heh . . . it happens.

First off, the man you hear talking is Stannis Baratheon, younger brother to King Robert (who died in the first season), and older brother to Renly. Renly, if you recall, is the guy who served as King Robert's Master of Laws on the Small Council, and who urged Ned to seize the throne before Queen Cersei could place her illegitimate son on it. Ned, of course, refused and Renly fled King's Landing to marshal his own forces. Both he and Stannis lay equal claim to the Iron Throne now, under the pretense that the new King Joffrey was no seed of their brother Robert. The two younger siblings, in turn, hate each other and seek to eliminate their rival despite the blood they share.

Yeah, it's getting positively Shakespearean up in this piece!

Although it is Stannis's voice you hear doing the narration (acted by the talented Stephen Dillane), the first person you actually see in the clip is Renly Baratheon, astride a horse and wearing the stag crown of his noble house. The next scene--a night time one--shows Stannis himself, accompanied by his wife Selyse and a host of soldiers. These two are new to the show, and were never seen in the first season. Stannis was only ever mentioned by name on several occasions, including once during that now infamous grooming/blowjob scene between Lord Renly and his buddy, Ser Loras Tyrell--aka, the Knight of Flowers.

You remember THAT, now, don't you?

Next we get a series of one-shots featuring many faces you should all be familiar with by now. Of particular note is the quick shot of a short-haired Arya Stark, who should have a sizable role this season if they are closely following the book. Yay!

Pay particular attention to what you're hearing near the very end of the clip (at the 0:30 mark). That's three horn blasts from the top of the Wall. This is significant, if you don't know. One horn blast means a Ranger of the Night's Watch is returning from patrol beyond the Wall. Two blasts means a Wildling attack is imminent.

But three blasts . . . well, that means the White Walkers are approaching. *shudder*

Damn, this season is going to be BAD ASS! Are you as excited as I am?

Sports Week Roundup

This has surely been a week for the ages in sports land. Where do I even begin?

West Coast Rattler In The MLB.

It all started with Jose Reyes leaving the Mets for the FL Marlins. Uh-oh, how low can the Mets sink now? As a dyed in the wool Yankees fan, I can only laugh at our poor miserable red-headed stepchild of a sports team we've got there across the East River. Their misfortune is my glee, and for them to lose who is arguably the "Derek Jeter" of the Mets -- well, I can only say good riddance! The Mets are a suck-ass excuse of an MLB team, and I think it's high time the local media admits it. In case some of you don't know, while the Yankees are of course the darlings here in New York, for some reason the actual news anchors who deliver the tv news are heavily slanted in favor of the Mets. I've never quite been able to get a clear explanation why this is the case, but I think it has to do with the "underdog" theory. Well, perhaps now they'll see just why the Mets deserve to continue being underdogs. They can't seem to do anything right!

Staying with the MLB, there was also news mid-week of Albert Pujols getting snatched up by the L.A. Angels. Oh great, as if that city needed MORE superstar sports stars on their local teams. I think this is going to be big trouble for the Yanks next season, as there are times I feel the Angels are a more feared rival than even the hated Boston Red Sux! Still, I'd be lying if I didn't admit to being excited about seeing Pujols on the West Coast. Too bad New York is aging pretty badly and won't really have anything to offer up next season to counter the threat from the West. Oh well, such are the whims of this sport. I still hold out hope that we can pull out some surprises of our own before Spring training begins.

NBA Losing Touch With Reality.

Or rather, Commissioner David Stern seems to be. Just when I thought L.A.'s luck couldn't possibly get any better, word came early in the week that the Lakers would be getting coveted super awesome point guard, Chris Paul. HOLY SHIT! I couldn't believe the news. Although, personally, I thought the deal stunk to high heaven from the get-go--I would never give up Gasol for ANY prospect in the entire NBA, period--I thought it was a gutsy move, and one that I could see as possibly paying off huge dividends for the Lake Show if handled properly. But then David Stern had a hissy fit and decided the league was better off without L.A. being an even bigger contender than it already was, nixing the deal in the name of fair balance to all the owners who currently have a shared stake in the N.O. Hornets. The fuck??? I've never seen more shady underhanded switcheroos going down in sports since the 1919 baseball World Series. And since I wasn't even around for that, this goes down as number 1 in my book. I mean, wow.

Still, while it's a shitty thing to have happen to Chris Paul, I guess there is nothing technically illegal with Stern stepping in. The Hornets are owned by the NBA, for all intents and purposes, and the Comish has the power to steer the NBA any way he deems necessary for the maximum revenue generation he sees fit. It still stinks, though. And I for one do not like it at all.

But on a local front, I'm pleased as punch to see our New York Knicks getting an early Christmas present this year. Tyson Chandler is now a Knick! OMG, I can't tell you how thrilled I am by this turn of events! Although it sucks if you are a Mavericks fan, eh? Damn, that must hit hard! But we get to benefit from Chandler's big-D, an area in which New York was sorely lacking. And with 'Mello and Amare already set in place, I think we're going to finally see the most dominant front court we've seen on the Knicks in what seems like AGES. And guess what? We also got veteran Mike Bibby, to boot! Holy shit! I'm a HUGE Bibby fan! Can this actually be the time for the Knicks to truly make their presence known? Christmas day is going to be extra special for me when they take on the Boston Celtics. Wow, what a game in the making!

There are rumblings that Dwight Howard may be coming to the Nets. If he does, this is going to be BIG, people! And I'm actually more of a Nets fan than I am of the Knicks! There's still no telling which way this rumor will turn out, but I have to admit I have my doubts. Will have to wait and see and cross my fingers in the meantime.

Let's Get Ready To RUMBLE!

The week started out huge with the fallout from the Cotto vs Margarito fight last Saturday. I was so glad to see that Mexican bum get his comeuppance, let me tell you. But it was a very good fight, nonetheless. As much as I hate the guy, Margarito does have staying power. But Cotto is the better boxer, and definitely the better man. Cheaters deserve to get punished and suffer in the worst way possible. I only wish the fight could have gone the full 10 and end in a spectacular knock-out! Though, to be honest, that was never going to happen with these two. Margarito, naturally, wanted a rematch immediately. Cotto just laughed it off for now, but personally I think there is one more bout left between these two heated rivals. Margarito's star is hugely diminished, but for the sake of closure I think there needs to be a definitive end to this saga.

HBO Sports had a big boxing event last night. Besides replaying the Cotto fight, they headlined the bout between super lightweights Amir Khan and Lamont Peterson live from Washington, D.C. But before we get to that, I have to say I was greatly entertained by the undercard heavyweight matchup between Timur Ibragimov and Seth Mitchell. The fight was over before the 2nd round even really began, but Mitchell impressed the hell out of me! Wow! The Uzbek, Ibragimov, is a respected technical fighter used to going long in the rounds -- but Mitchell absolutely put him down while barely breaking a sweat. I can't wait to see more from this guy in the future.

The main event of the night, Khan vs Peterson, was one of the better fights I've seen in a long time. I was so not expecting that! I honestly thought the bout would go long, but that Khan would come out on top in every round. Such was not the case. Peterson showed great heart out there, and really gave it as well, if not better, than he was getting. Still, I'm highly upset at the outcome. Although local boy Peterson did fight with real guts out there, there was no doubt in my mind that the fight belonged to Khan. But due to some truly bizarre officiating, the Brit ended up losing on the count of two points deducted for pushing. Pushing? PUSHING??? Are you fucking serious? That was some bullshit right there! The ref never even gave him any hard warnings. He did tell Khan to stop doing it a few times, but never a direct, hard-nosed warning like you would expect before a full deduction. And who the hell takes away points for pushing, anyway? Bizzare, I tell you!

So Peterson (right) is the new champ, and honestly it was an awesome fight. He showed great class, too, by immediately agreeing to a rematch. Really, it's the decent thing to do considering the shady circumstances surrounding the decision.

NFL Sunday Is The Place To Be.

Right now I'm watching the Kansas City Chiefs get absolutely demolished by Gang Green as I type this. It's good to see the Jets finally getting their act together, but I only wish it was against a more worthy opponent. I can't say this impending win inspires much confidence in me for where they go after this, but hey . . . one step at a time, eh?

The bigger news today, of course, is the matchup between my beloved NY Giants and that scrappy, little-known team you may have heard of, the Dallas Cowboys. HOO-BOY! I've been antsy ALL FUCKING WEEK for this game! Even today I've been a restless ball of nervous energy for the game to hurry up and BEGIN already! But, of course, the NFL wants to drag out my torture by scheduling it as the premiere lineup later tonight. Pure, unadulterated TORTURE, I tell ya! This is going to be a game to end all games. So much is on the line for the Giants. It's do or die for my team here. It's so big that I really have next to zero interest in whatever the hell else is going on in the NFL right now. I'm vaguely aware that the Pats and Redskins are involved in a major throw-down this current moment, with the Pats on top so far. And that's all good and all, but -- GO BIG BLUE!!!!

And that, as they say, is all the news that's fit to print. Sound off on your own thoughts re: the big sports week we've just had, and are still having, in the comments section below. Also, if you will (and if you follow such things), be sure to include your pick for who you think will survive tonight's big NFC East showdown. Pretty please?

Have a good Sunday, all!


EDIT @ 12:13am:   Phew! That was such a nail biter of a game. Right down to the wire. SWEET MAMMA-JAMMA, JAMBALAYA!!! I must have had a hundred heart attacks during the 4th quarter alone, plus another one when 6 seconds were left on the clock for that attempted field kick. Jesus H. Christ! But, alas, I am so thrilled the G-Men pulled it off. Wow, Eli was looking like a real QB down the stretch there. He showed heart against the Cowgirls on their own turf! It was close, but I'll take that win straight to the bank, thank you very much. WOOOOO!!! :)